I worked in commerce and sales more than 15 years.
I tried so hard to do my best at it and because my best seemed to be not enough, I thought that:
I wasn’t enough.
Now, looking back at those 15 years, I understand things differently:
I was enough! My perceptions told me ‘’ I am less’’ so I made choices from within those perceptions.
Easy. I chose to dismiss a lot of parts of me, hide them from myself and others.
I thought those parts made me unsuitable for the business world in which I wanted to fit.
I set myself in a “I am not Enough” mode by hiding parts that were authentically mine.
People can sense other people. Confident people, those who I wanted to be like and be with, they dismissed me because I was in a “I am not Enough” mode.
Which? Which parts did I hide? I have a couple of examples:
My generous side.
People considered me naive because I was generous. So I just shut it down.
My dreamer part.
Others considered that I am childish because I had dreams. So I just shut it down.
By shutting these down, it was me that just gave up being enough: